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Bossypants

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  • Book Title: Bossypants
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  • Author: Asama Davran
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  • Synopsis: Amazon.com Review Bossypants is short, messy, and impossibly funny (an apt description of the comedian herself).

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Bossypants Quotes by Tina Fey

Bossypants Quotes

First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.

May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.

When the Crystal Meth is offered, May she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer.

Guide her, protect her

When crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age.

Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels.

What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.

Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen. Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait.

O Lord, break the Internet forever, That she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.

And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.

And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M. all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back.

“My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes.

But I think the first real change in women’s body image came when JLo turned it butt-style. That was the first time that having a large-scale situation in the back was part of mainstream American beauty. Girls wanted butts now. Men were free to admit that they had always enjoyed them. And then, what felt like moments later, boom—Beyoncé brought the leg meat. A back porch and thick muscular legs were now widely admired. And from that day forward, women embraced their diversity and realized that all shapes and sizes are beautiful. Ah ha ha. No. I’m totally messing with you. All Beyonce and JLo have done is add to the laundry list of attributes women must have to qualify as beautiful. Now every girl is expected to have Caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall ass, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, the arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits. The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes.

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www.goodreads.com

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Книги на английском • Читай и слушай в оригинале

Alexander Michael - Confessions of a Male Nurse

Anderson Wes - The Grand Budapest Hotel

Fey Tina - Bossypants

Before Liz Lemon, before "Weekend Update," before "Sarah Palin," Tina Fey was just a young girl with a dream: a recurring stress dream that she was being chased through a local airport by her middle-school gym teacher. She also had a dream that one day she would be a comedian on TV.

At last, Tina Fey's story can be told. From her youthful days as a vicious nerd to her tour of duty on Saturday Night Live; from her passionately halfhearted pursuit of physical beauty to her life as a mother eating things off the floor; from her one-sided college romance to her nearly fatal honeymoon — from the beginning of this paragraph to this final sentence.

Tina Fey reveals all, and proves what we've all suspected: you're no one until someone calls you bossy.

Gary K. Wolf - Who Wacked Roger Rabbit?

Eddie's a big fan of Coop. Of Roger? Not so much.

Now a sinister hoodlum is threatening to murder Coop if the movie gets made. Before long, Eddie, Coop, Roger, and the ever-glamorous Jessica Rabbit are embroiled in a mystery that could destroy Toontown. When Roger bites off more Toonish trouble than Eddie can swallow, the answer to the question Who Wacked Roger Rabbit? suddenly becomes no laughing matter.

Chuck Palahniuk - Pygmy

The Manchurian Candidate meets South Park—Chuck Palahniuk’s finest novel since the generation-defining Fight Club.

Thus speaks Pygmy, one of a handful of young adults from a totalitarian state sent to the United States, disguised as exchange students, to live with typical American families and blend in, all the while planning an unspecified act of massive terrorism. Palahniuk depicts Midwestern life through the eyes of this thoroughly indoctrinated little killer, who hates us with a passion, in this cunning double-edged satire of an American xenophobia that might, in fact, be completely justified. For Pygmy and his fellow operatives are cooking up something big, something truly awful, that will bring this big dumb country and its fat dumb inhabitants to their knees.

It’s a comedy. And a romance.

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Listen to Bossypants by Tina Fey at

Duration: 5 hours 34 minutes Summary:

Before Liz Lemon, before "Weekend Update," before "Sarah Palin," Tina Fey was just a young girl with a dream: a recurring stress dream that she was being chased through a local airport by her middle-school gym teacher. She also had a dream that one day she would be a comedian on TV.

She has seen both these dreams come true.

At last, Tina Fey's story can be told. From her youthful days as a vicious nerd to her tour of duty on Saturday Night Live; from her passionately halfhearted pursuit of physical beauty to her life as a mother eating things off the floor; from her one-sided college romance to her nearly fatal honeymoon -- from the beginning of this paragraph to this final sentence.

Tina Fey reveals all, and proves what we've all suspected: you're no one until someone calls you bossy.

(Includes Special, Never-Before-Solicited Opinions on Breastfeeding, Princesses, Photoshop, the Electoral Process, and Italian Rum Cake!)

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www.audiobooks.com

Tina Fey s Bossypants: the star s brand of tough girl feminism

Tina Fey's Bossypants: the star's brand of tough girl feminism. Tina Fey's Bossypants: the star's brand of tough girl feminism. Tina Fey's Tough Girl Feminism

Regardless of whether you think Tina Fey's new book, Bossypants . has an off-putting cover or title, regardless of whether you think it merited not one but two New Yorker excerpts, as if it were a long lost early manuscript of Lolita in which Humbert and Lo live happily ever after—you will have to concede that it offers a valuable insight into navigating gender politics. Fey's strategy for dealing with everything from entrenched discrimination to garden-variety chauvinism is to write a joke, a better joke than the other people in the room. You see, some of us have forgotten this basic point: Responding to a situation with humor, as opposed to, say, dead-serious self-righteousness, is a rhetorically effective way to get a political point across.

Take Fey's response to the anonymous (and possibly fictional) crackpot who posts on the Internet: "[I]n my opinion Tina Fey completely ruined SNL. The only reason she is celebrated is because she's a woman and an outspoken liberal. She has not a single funny bone in her body." Fey's retort in her book:

Huzzah for the Truth Teller! Women in this country have been over-celebrated for too long. Just last night there was a story on my local news about a 'missing girl' … and I thought, "What is this, the News for Chicks?" Then there was some story about Hillary Clinton flying to some country because she's secretary of state. Why do we keep talking about these dumdums? We are a society that constantly celebrates no one but women and it must stop!

At the letter's end she adds, for good measure: "P.S. You know who does have a funny bone in her body? Your mom every night for a dollar."

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Part of what makes Fey's good jokes into insightful commentaries is the way they draw on and expose an argument's emotional or psychological underpinnings. In response to men who claim that women are not funny, as Christopher Hitchens notoriously argued in Vanity Fair . Fey writes, "My hat goes off to them. It is an impressively arrogant move to conclude that because you don't like something, it is empirically not good. I don't like Chinese food, but I don't write articles trying to prove it doesn't exist." Her buoyant, manic humor is sometimes the best way to expose and pin down the sheer absurdity of our current sexual politics. She has, for instance, a riff on frequently asked questions about 30 Rock. "Q: Has Tracy Morgan ever French kissed an NBC executive? A: Yes, but only at an official NBC event, and only against her will."

One imagines that it must have been difficult for Fey to forge her career in the largely male-dominated world of comedy writing, and her manner of addressing this difficulty is a set piece on how many of her male comedy writing colleagues pee in cups in their office because they are too lazy to walk 12 steps to the bathroom. This recurring motif makes an eloquent point about both the sexism in the office and her transcendence of that sexism in a single running joke. Her attitude is not resentment or simmering or a boring, ordinary, low-grade victimhood, but rather a more accurate and nuanced portrait of the modern working woman. Take the following footnote, with its complicated intermingling of attitudes: "I say Harvard "Boys" because they are almost always male—but not exclusively; rock on Amy Ozols!—and because they are usually under twenty-five and have never done physical labor with their arms or legs. I love them very much." This is pretty much the tenor of her stance toward the comedy establishment more generally: one of affectionate and complex mockery, love, and critical thinking. As Fey's brushes with what she alternately calls "The Harvard Nerds" make clear, humor is power, and a sense of humor about yourself is even more power.

And by humor, I don't mean the automatic-pilot snideness, or contentless cattiness, or jealous innuendo, or ironic jibberish that sometimes passes for humor in certain parts of the Internet and Internet-influenced culture. I am referring to Fey's complex, spirited, intelligent kind of funniness, which has the effect of laying bare some of the more insidious, unspoken, ridiculous assumptions behind our standard pieties and official narratives. Here she is on the fashionable pressures on new mothers: "If you choose not to love your baby enough to breastfeed, you can pump your milk using a breast pump."

If you look at strong women writers of the past who were writing in a very male world, you can trace a comic strain of tough girl feminism. Mary McCarthy's brilliant 1953 essay "My Confession" comes to mind, with its critique of the self-serious communist young men of the day: "Marxism, I saw, from the learned young men I listened to at Committee meetings, was something you had to take up young, like ballet dancing." Scathing to those serious young men, that "ballet dancing," but elegant, somehow.

Or we could go further back still. In 1912, in The Freewoman, the young Rebecca West responds to a man who wrote that the solution to the "woman problem" was marriage. She imagines what would happen,

[I]f all we brazen hussies who are suffragettes and feminists became converted to Mr. Owen's belief that every woman ought to throw up her economic independence and get some man to keep her! Think of us rushing about, trying with all that vitality we are at present misdirecting in clawing policemen and wrecking the home to attract men … We will paint the town red!

A childhood incident Tina Fey writes about in the book perfectly captures this tougher, funnier strain of feminism. When she is 13, someone shouts at her from a car, "Nice tits," and she instinctively shouts back, "Suck my dick." If the kind of smart talking-back on display here and elsewhere in the book caught hold, perhaps it would be more effective than the 14 sexual harassment seminars Fey says she sat through at NBC. If the feminist movement has work left to do, in other words, surely it could use a little more Tina Fey, and a little less paint-by-numbers punditry or bloggy smirking.

Source:

www.slate.com

Recommended Books: Bossypants Download and Read Online (PDF, DOC, EPub) Format - 1st Grade Book Online

Bossypants

Download Book () Bossypants by Tina Fey read online free (PDF Format). Before Liz Lemon, before “Weekend Update,” before “Sarah Palin,” Tina Fey was just a young girl with a dream: a recurring stress dream that she was being chased through a local airport by her middle-school gym teacher. She also had a dream that one day she would be a comedian on TV.

She has seen both these dreams come true.

At last, Tina Fey’s story can be told. From her youthful days as a vicious nerd to her tour of duty on Saturday Night Live; from her passionately halfhearted pursuit of physical beauty to her life as a mother eating things off the floor; from her one-sided college romance to her nearly fatal honeymoon—from the beginning of this paragraph to this final sentence.

Tina Fey reveals all, and proves what we’ve all suspected: you’re no one until someone calls you bossy.

(Includes Special, Never-Before-Solicited Opinions on Breastfeeding, Princesses, Photoshop, the Electoral Process, and Italian Rum Cake!)

An unabridged recording on 5 CDs (5.5 Hours).

Number Of Pages

Reviews of Bossypants

Tina Fey’s Bossypants was a disappointment. I don’t know that expecting much from a comedy writer’s cash-in big-font-with-pictures essay/memoir…thing…is fair, but I’ve been a Tina Fey fan since 30 Rock began, ready to trust her literary aspirations, and even to me this book barely scratches onto the two star plateau.

What did I expect? Well, it’s probably easier to explain what I didn’t expect. I wasn’t counting on a sour, muddled, defensive screed against anyone who pissed off the author in

The best audiobook I’ve listened to in a long, long time. And that’s saying something.

I ended up picking this up because when I sent up a signal flare on Twitter, it was the most recommended book by far.

1. The narration was exceptionally good. (I like autobiography being read by the author, but not all authors are good narrators.)

2. It’s legitimately funny.

3. It’s legitimately thoughtful and insightful.

I’ll also say that I read this book cold. I didn’t really know who Tina Fe

I honestly cannot remember the last time I laughed this hard reading anything (only a Jonathan Tropper novel or a Dave Sedaris collection comes close). I finished the other night with wet cheeks from the tears that’d escaped my eyes. The bed had been shaking I was laughing so hard!

So what’s to love about “Bossypants,” besides everything? For starters, how Tina just tells it (and by “it,” I mean everything from working at SNL to impersonating Sarah Palin) like it is. She’s got a fierce feminist

Sure, you could read Bossypants. Provided you like all that self-deprecating “I’m Tina Fey and I am enormously successful and I am thankful for that, but at the same time I still struggle with being a working woman with a real life, because it is so weird that I am a media icon when I still really think of myself as an unpopular high school theater dweeb, and isn’t life weird, like when I was seen as a major influence during the last election because I kind of look like Sarah Palin?” stuff.

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    Bossypants: NPR

    Bossypants Excerpt: Bossypants Bossypants Reagan Arthur Books

    Copyright © 2011Fey, Tina
    All right reserved.

    ISBN: 9780316056861

    M y brother is eight years older than I am. I was a big surprise. A wonderful surprise, my mom would be quick to tell you. Although having a baby at forty is a commonplace fool’s errand these days, back in 1970 it was pretty unheard-of. Women around my mom’s office referred to her pregnancy as “Mrs. Fey and her change-of-life baby.” When I was born I was fussed over and doted on, and my brother has always looked out for me like a third parent.

    The day before I started kindergarten, my parents took me to the school to meet the teacher. My mom had taken my favorite blanket and stitched my initials into it for nap time, just like she’d done for my brother eight years earlier. At the teacher conference my dad tried to give my nap time blanket to the teacher, and she just smiled and said, “Oh, we don’t do that anymore.” That’s when I realized I had old parents. I’ve been worried about them ever since.

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    While my parents talked to the teacher, I was sent to a table to do coloring. I was introduced to a Greek boy named Alex whose mom was next in line to meet with the teacher. We colored together in silence. I was so used to being praised and encouraged that when I finished my drawing I held it up to show Alex, who immediately ripped it in half. I didn’t have the language to express my feelings then, but my thoughts were something like “Oh, it’s like that, motherfucker? Got it.” Mrs. Fey’s change-of-life baby had entered the real world.

    During the spring semester of kindergarten, I was slashed in the face by a stranger in the alley behind my house. Don’t worry. I’m not going to lay out the grisly details for you like a sweeps episode of Dateline. I only bring it up to explain why I’m not going to talk about it.

    I’ve always been able to tell a lot about people by whether they ask me about my scar. Most people never ask, but if it comes up naturally somehow and I offer up the story, they are quite interested. Some people are just dumb: “Did a cat scratch you?” God bless. Those sweet dumdums I never mind. Sometimes it is a fun sociology litmus test, like when my friend Ricky asked me, “Did they ever catch the black guy that did that to you?” Hmmm. It was not a black guy, Ricky, and I never said it was.

    Then there’s another sort of person who thinks it makes them seem brave or sensitive or wonderfully direct to ask me about it right away. They ask with quiet, feigned empathy, “How did you get your scar?” The grossest move is when they say they’re only curious because “it’s so beautiful.” Ugh. Disgusting. They might as well walk up and say, “May I be amazing at you?” To these folks let me be clear. I’m not interested in acting out a TV movie with you where you befriend a girl with a scar. An Oscar-y Spielberg movie where I play a mean German with a scar? Yes.

    My whole life, people who ask about my scar within one week of knowing me have invariably turned out to be egomaniacs of average intelligence or less. And egomaniacs of average intelligence or less often end up in the field of TV journalism. So, you see, if I tell the whole story here, then I will be asked about it over and over by the hosts of Access Movietown and Entertainment Forever for the rest of my short-lived career.

    But I will tell you this: My scar was a miniature form of celebrity. Kids knew who I was because of it. Lots of people liked to claim they were there when it happened. I was there. I saw it. Crazy Mike did it!

    Adults were kind to me because of it. Aunts and family friends gave me Easter candy and oversize Hershey’s Kisses long after I was too old for presents. I was made to feel special.

    What should have shut me down and made me feel “less than” ended up giving me an inflated sense of self. It wasn’t until years later, maybe not until I was writing this book, that I realized people weren’t making a fuss over me because I was some incredible beauty or genius; they were making a fuss over me to compensate for my being slashed.

    I accepted all the attention at face value and proceeded through life as if I really were extraordinary. I guess what I’m saying is, this has all been a wonderful misunderstanding. And I shall keep these Golden Globes, every last one!

    Source:

    www.npr.org

    Bossypants

    Bossypants

    Bossypants is an autobiographical comedy book written by American comedian Tina Fey. The book topped The New York Times Best Seller list . and stayed there for five weeks upon its release. Since its release, the book has sold over one million copies in the U.S. Fey's Grammy nominated narration of the audiobook has sold over 150,000 copies on Audible.com. A paperback reprint edition was released in January 2012, from Reagan Arthur Books. an imprint of Little, Brown.

    Background

    In 2008, the prospect of a Tina Fey book was reportedly the subject of a bidding war among publishers, which led to an advance of $6 million. As part of her deal with Little, Brown & Co. a gift was made to the New York-based Books for Kids Foundation.

    Synopsis

    Fey uses humorous anecdotes to tell her life story, including how she came to be on Saturday Night Live and how she created 30 Rock .

    Chapter One: Origin Story

    Fey recalls the childhood attack that left her with a facial scar, and how others have reacted to it. Fey also talks about how it was a way to see a different perspective on life.

    This article is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License. which means that you can copy and modify it as long as the entire work (including additions) remains under this license.

    Rapper Kanye West has gifted his wife Kim Kardashian a video montage of never-seen-before childhood moment as her birthday present . 01.13. 1101. Lady Gaga. Fey has received seven Emmy Awards. two Golden Globe Awards. five Screen Actors Guild Awards. four Writers Guild of America Awards and has been nominated for a Grammy Award for her autobiographical book Bossypants. which topped the The New York Times Best Seller list for five weeks. J.

    In her book “Bossypants ,” Fey called this episode, which features a bizarre storyline in which Jenna attempts to woo a European prince crippled by centuries of inbreeding, the moment “30 Rock ” found it’s voice. A delightfully bitter Carrie Fisher plays Liz’s childhood hero, and Alec Baldwin gets one of his funniest moments on the series, role-playing as Tracy ’s family in a fake therapy session . .

    As she revealed in her memoir Bossypants. her “embarrassing secret” about 30 Rock is that they “weren’t trying to make a low-rated critical darling that snarled in the face of conventionality.” Instead. she wrote, “We were trying to make a hit show … we were trying to make Home Improvement. and we did it wrong.”..

    Tina Fey and Jimmy Fallon made a surprise return to “Weekend Update ” on SNL tonight . — Nigerians & Friends (@NaijapalsOnline) October 9, 2016. — Saturday Night Live (@nbcsnl) October 9, 2016. Fey discussed in her best-selling memoir Bossypants that during the 2008 election Michaels had asked for help with panning the 2008 election due to her strong physical resemblance to vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin.

    “We saw more positive emotion in Hillary Clinton ’s face than we’ve seen before,” he said . “There was no big loser, in terms of facial displays. “Going into the debate, I believed Trump needed to avoid coming across as a bully, and Clinton needed to avoid being seen as a bossypants ,” Muñoz said. But I would say she very definitely avoided being a bossypants. but he did not avoid being a bully.

    Schumer recently said she is not trying to be likable, but you wouldn’t guess it from this book. Such memoirs are pitched as feminist statements, but of what kind. @HadleyFreeman . As this was 2012. Fontana was referring to Tina Fey ’s Bossypants. Chelsea Handler ’s My Horizontal Life. Sarah Silverman ’s The Bedwetter and Mindy Kaling ’s Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me. all of which were smart, funny and deservedly bestsellers.

    It's inevitable — at almost any workplace you will run into "problem" coworkers. Some of these types of problematic coworkers include the negative coworker, the overly competitive coworker, the gossip, the bully and the person who pushes off work . The negative coworker. Whenever I think about negative co-workers, I'm reminded of a quote from one of my favorite books, "Bossypants " by Tina Fey. This person does the latter. The gossip.

    The Insider Picks team writes about stuff we think you'll like . Buy it here>>. "Bossypants " by Tina Fey. After her stint as one half of the greatest "Weekend Update " team to ever grace the news desk in Studio 8H, Tina Fey wrote "Bossypants ," a memoir of her childhood, her dream of working as a comedian on television, and her recurring nightmare of being chased through a local airport by her middle-school gym teacher. Disclosure.

    Inside the essay collection (out on Tuesday), you'll be treated to some fairly explicit and frankly hilarious tales . SEE ALSO. Amy Schumer. Seth Rogen stump for equal pay in Bud Light 's latest fake political ad. Girl With the Lower Back Tattoo is different from the big comedian autobiographies we've been pummeled with in recent years, from Steve Martin 's Born Standing Up to Amy Poehler 's Yes Please and Tina Fey 's Bossypants. SEE ALSO.

    Amy Schumer starts her highly-anticipated essay collection off with a lie. Right there in the introduction — emphasis hers — she writes, “I also want to clarify that this book has NO SELF-HELP INFO OR ADVICE FOR YOU.” But I have to disagree . “What did he eat for breakfast? I thought. She didn’t try to write Bossypants 2 or Not That Kind of Girl. Either but something entirely her own, and entirely—for her as much as for us—necessary. B+.

    There's Mario Batali. there's Giada De Laurentiis. and now there's Stefani Germanotta. The singer-songwriter now known as Lady Gaga will be releasing a cookbook in November, titled Joanne Trattoria Cookbook. Classic Recipes and Scenes From an Italian American Restaurant. alongside her father, Joe Germanotta . Joe himself authored the book, while Gaga penned the forward. 1. "Bossypants " by Tina Fey. $9.59 Buy. 2. $16.80 Buy. 3. 4. 5. 6.

    Comedy star Kevin Hart will release his album as rapper alter ego Chocolate Droppa. Droppa's debut album will come this year . Kevin Hart. 01.43. 1101. Madonna. Fey has received seven Emmy Awards. two Golden Globe Awards. five Screen Actors Guild Awards. four Writers Guild of America Awards and has been nominated for a Grammy Award for her autobiographical book Bossypants. which topped the The New York Times Best Seller list for five weeks.

    Source:

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